To the (Very) Overwhelmed Wife

Dearest Overwhelmed Wife,

I thought about you this morning. I opened my eyes and saw my to-do list staring at me from the foot of the bed. I pulled the covers back over my head and tried to ignore it. But I could hear it’s hot little breath on me, and could feel it tapping on my leg. So I jumped out of bed and went to the kitchen, but its footsteps were pitter-pattering right behind me. I felt that frantic feeling well up in me as I turned around and read the long list of things I have to get done. That is when I thought of you. I felt for you because I know how awful it feels to be overwhelmed. I know what it’s like to send gifts that arrive a week too late.

We put the tree up way later than usual this year. I couldn’t find the right box of ornaments so I just added lots of candy canes and called it good. I tossed some snowmen around the room in no particular order. There is no little snow village on the mantle, and I sent the Elf of The Shelf to Mexico this year. Baking Christmas treats sound like a good way to make up for the lack, but I am not eating wheat products or sugar, and I am too tired to research coconut flour anything. Besides, I would prefer to not gain ten pounds during December. That would be helpful.

I was at the mall trying to find stocking stuffers for eight people, gifts for out of town friends and family, Christmas pajamas for my fourth born because I forgot to buy his last year and he cried in front of the whole family when it came to his turn and he had nothing. I felt like the worst mother ever to live, so I owe him two pair, and all the while I was lamenting that we didn’t get a family photo to use for cards. Again.

But guess what? Most of the pressure is there because I put it there.

This morning I checked a couple of things off of my to-do list so he would stop staring at me, and then I sat down by the fire with a cup of coffee, grabbed my laptop, turned off my smart phone, and sat down to write you a letter. Because we are kindred spirits and I want you to have a better day.

If you feel like there is too much weighing on you, it’s because there is. It’s pure craziness in December. But God tells us that his burden is light, so if you are straining under the pressure, let it go. (I know . . . that dumb song just came to my mind too.) Here, read this out loud today:

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. —Matthew 11:28-30

Doesn’t that sound lovely? Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you REST. You will find rest for your souls . . . my burden is LIGHT. Exhale. Here we are, celebrating the birth of Jesus, and we are running around like crazy people trying to make that celebration just right. It seems a little ironic. He is telling us He brings rest for our souls. He is the Prince of Peace. But we are feeling everything but peace. HE is the gift we are celebrating, yet we are not at rest in any way shape or form.

I remember when my children were babies. How cozy it was to hold them close, all wrapped up in their blanket. It was the best way to rest. Their soft breath rising and falling slowly. Their sweet little eyes looking intently at me as I held them. They were the very picture of gentleness. Of rest. This is the feeling you should have. God came to give you peace. That is the best part of the Christmas message.

This baby, who came to save you from the isolation and sin that comes with being human, is the gift. It’s not Black Friday sales, or beautifully wrapped presents. It’s not even gluten-free cinnamon rolls with organic sugar and hand ground cinnamon. The gift is our Lord, who came to give us rest. There is a place you can go, in the midst of the chaos this season. A place where you can leave your heavy burden and carry nothing in return.

If you feel alone, rejected, or unworthy, it’s OK. Jesus is enough. He arrived as a sweet little baby, and he finished as a triumphant King. So from peace to victory, you are covered. You are not supposed to facilitate the perfect Christmas atmosphere. You are to find rest.

That is what I want to remind you of this day.

Love,
Your Fellow Overwhelmed Wife